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Khun Mae said that if we can practice patience successfully and endure at one place, then we have endurance anywhere we go. If we cannot stay at one place because of conflict, then everywhere we go we would encounter conflict. People are similar everywhere- therefore wherever we go we would also face challenges.
That’s why she told us that it is important to look at our own hearts instead of judging other people’s characters and looking down on them. If someone were to go to Khun Mae and start to talk bad about another person, obviously the state of heart of that person is questionable.
If anyone who had stayed with Khun Mae for a while start to complain about someone that they may not get along well with, Khun Mae would listen quietly. Once the person finished talking, Khun Mae would if the person had observed her own heart or not.
If there was any conflict, she would call both parties to hear their respective versions. Then, she would evaluate the situation based on sila (precepts). She said in any situation, she does not take sides or give anyone preference. She looked at whose sila is incorrect. And in actual sense, the precepts go beyond just the 5 or 8 precepts. If we say very hurtful words towards someone, we are ‘killing’ the person’s heart- thus we broke the first precept.